I have been away for a while as we adjust to our new life with a full house again !! After dealing with some health issues and getting those back on track I am ready to be here again writing !!!
I picked this subject because it is something I have been dealing with lately. I went from having the house to myself all day when my husband was at work and being able to do whatever I wanted in quiet each day, to having to adjust to a full house and things sometimes out of my control, which was hard, because when we were raising the kids, we had control and could set the pace, but not anymore.
Now, I have to plan my day around others, and it makes it harder sometimes, but you just have to adjust. I found that I have floundered for a while as I tried to figure out how to create and have the life I want while living in a small area of our house. I went from a full room to myself for creating, to one room that serves as our bedroom , office and studio. It makes it a lot harder to do.
I have spent months watching too much tv and being pretty bored. I just could not seem to get exctited and motivated about anything and I have wasted so much time. I finally just decided that if I want the life I want, to be creative and busy and having fun, I have to make it happen, it is just that simple. If I wait until I am not needed to babysit or to help out, well, that may never happen. With four kids, and three of them so far with at least two kids, it is a constant stream of sitting and helping out through the week. My daughter in law actually gave me good advice that I took a long time taking, it is hard for anyone to acknowledge I am working on things, if I am not working on things and product to show for it. ie, I have to do the things I want to do and prove to them I am busy, so when I really want to work on something, like this blog, or the book I am working on, or jewelry or my photography, then I need to do it and then let them work around me when possible. Sometimes w hen appts or work are involved, I need to be a bit flexable and this is for all our kids, not just the ones living with us. We really sit less for them then our other daughter who does not live with us.
I am rambling a bit here, I am a bit rusty, but the point I am trying to make is, you have to decide what you want to do, and then put that first. Set time in the day for your creative efforts, and then as much as possible defend your territory and have them work around you whenever they can. If you do not set some limits, you will find that you go from day to day feeling frusstrated by your lack of purpose and boredom and have no idea how to get out of that rut. That is exactly what I have been going through for a while now and now it has been months since I posted here.
It is really easy to get swept up in the day to day of having a full nest again. You almost do not see it happening. Now, you can’t just let the dishes set, and do them later in the day , now it affects other people. You cannot just assume the laundry is free whenever, another family has to do thiers so you have to tag team your laundry. Same with cooking if you are eating seperate meals, which we do for health reasons, I am on a strict diet so we have to work with each other in the kitchen. It is so easy to let those things distract you and overwelm you and pretty soon you are just on the sofa watching tv and thinking how bored you are and that you never do anything anymore !! I have been in that spot for months now and I finally decided that enough was enough !!! I want more and my kids want me to have more !!
We become better parents and grandparents and spouses when we feel personally fullfilled with our lives. When we get up excited about the day and looking forward to projects and hobbies, it makes us happier and more interesting people than we are when all we talk about is the headlines on AOL or what we saw on tv !! I know for me, when at the end of the day, I see something I have created myself, a page in my blog, a chapter for my book, some photos I am proud of or a piece of jewelry I designed and made that I love, it makes the day a better day. It is something well worth fighting for.
So, if you , like me, are caught in a rut, you have to pull your feet out of that mud and get out, and find what you want to do and just do it now. If you are confused about what you want to do, then try some things. Take some glasses at your craft store or the community college, find something you can really get exctied about and then do it !! Think back to when you were a teen, what did you love, even as a child, did you love to draw, or paint, or even play an instrument ?? That is a great place to start !!
I think as parents we often lose our childlike wonder of life and if we can recapture even a bit of that, our lives can be so much better and so much more interesting and full !!!
So, get out there and create something , and have fun doing it, and you might be so surprised how happy it makes you, you just have to take that first step and do it !!!